I don’t know where to start. I’m not sure where the beginning is. We change by increments until–at some point–change changes us…and we are transformed. And transformation no longer recognizes the path of its creation. Is that what happened to me?
Shedding Skins. That’s what I thought I was doing. I thought, like a snake, I was simply outgrowing my skin…sloughing it away through different stages of my life so that new skin could emerge. As a child, I watched garden snakes lie quietly as their bodies made small, rippling motions that pushed the old skin away. I wondered if it was painful (I think it was.) And I was mesmerized by the brilliance of their new, fresh scales emerging. I watched them slither away when done, and I collected the discarded skins…I was fascinated by shedding skins!
The imagery stayed with me as I grew into adulthood and seemed like perfect metaphor for the process of change and growth in my evolving psyche. Yes, change was itchy and uncomfortable for me, and, yes, I did feel somewhat vulnerable in it’s process…but oh how brilliant and fresh I felt every time I grew and changed! With every major transition, I believed I was emerging in a fresh, new skin. I never questioned the metaphor until recently.
Perhaps it was speed…change has been coming fast (and sometimes hard) these past few years. Starting with the decision to go to Abadiana, Brazil in 2011 which led to leaving Abraham-Hicks Publications as the web design and development team, my partner and I –without consciously realizing it–chose the fast track for change. On all levels: career, relationships, health, cross-country moves…you name it, and there’s a good likelihood that, in the course of the past three years, we’ve taken that change and ridden it. So many changes so fast–is that what evoked transformation?
In self-reflection, I looked upon myself and realized I was no longer a “snake.” Somewhere, in the course of changing and growing, I had either evolved into a new creature altogether…or I’d missed that there was more to me than “just snake” until I shed enough skins to see with more depth and dimensionality. Either way, in self reflection I found myself transformed.
Was I always part dragon or did transformation have its way with me? Chinese astrology calls me a Water Snake…did they really mean baby dragon?
I look back upon my life and think, “Yes, dragon was always here.” The way I would step up my energy signature if someone thought they could intimidate me. The manner in which I pursued truth, regardless of the approval–or disapproval–it brought my way. The clarity and intelligence that seemed to speak “through” me at times as though from a vaster mind than mine. And–if dragon was present always within me–that begs the question: Was the shedding of skins less about change and more about dissolving the barriers to becoming who I am? If the real intention is about recognizing and welcoming all I am into conscious awareness (and loving it), then the purpose of change is for releasing all that obstructs my ability to love All I Am, right?
So there it is…three years of transformative change since I began the exploration of visiting Casa de Dom Inacio in Abadiania, Brazil…and it would seem the healing prayers I made are answered by learning to love that I am not just human…but also dragon 😉 It is possible, I suppose, that my human body will sustain a vitality and vim and vigor more effectively when I am loving all it embodies. Time, of course, will tell.
And I wonder: If there is dragon in me, is there unicorn in you? Are we all of us carrying magical beasts within the wholeness of who we are? Is awakening more about recognizing and remembering all that being multi-dimensional means than it is waking up from sleep? I am intrigued! What do you think?
Thank you. I love you.
Enjoyed this. I don’t have time to answer the mail most days now that I’m working again after fifteen years and four back surgeries. I’ve followed your journey with much interest over these last years. So much has changed for you and your spirit while you write is encouraging always. I was born in the year of the water dragon so this touched me dearly. I’ve scaled back my mail box of letters I don’t get to read any more so it will give me time to actually reply to a few. The journey is still a mystery to me most days and I have listen/read/seen so many teachings in the last 40 years that I’ve been searching for my own answers. As I near 62 I have watched even those teachings shed their skins many times and emerge as “new age” again and again. Perhaps someday we can talk more about that. Big hugs and know you are wished well this morning. Jacki
Blessings on your day, Jackie 😀
Each in our own journey and, still somehow connected, we lift each other up, right? I applaud your shedding skins as well. Congratulations, on the new job!
Ahnalira